Laura and I wrote our own marriage vows when we got married. We thought it would be cool to do something different. I never really questioned that until I read this in World Magazine by David Blankenhorn.
I think it’s better for couples to use the vows of their faith community, rather than make up their own. If you make up your own vows, the not-so-subtle message is that the couple is bigger than the vowâ€”the couple, in that sense, is the God of their marriage.
But isn’t it more true and beautiful to say that the vow is bigger than the couple? That the vow makes the couple, rather than the other way around? I wish more ministers who officiate marriages would insist that the couple, in this sense, try to conform to the vow rather than imagining that they are creating the vow. — from World Magazine, August 4, 2007