In the last post in this series we saw that God created men to be kings. As kings, men are wired to take initiative and get things done, to have dominion over every part of their lives: over themselves, their stuff, their relationships and their work. Men are called to be get-it-done dudes who refuse to sit back and let their lives unravel and fall apart.
But as kings, men can also abuse or abdicate their power to rule. This is where we find the stereotypes of men-as-kings, as either power-hungry bullies or passive, lazy weaklings. These two extremes exist because men do not rightly use their God-given authority to rule with wisdom and justice.
Power-hungry men recognize their need to take control of their lives, but they overreach by using anger and fear to take control. They often come across as obnoxious and self-consumed. They can be tyrannical and unpredictable, and even unapproachable. They believe they are responsible for making everything happen, so they encroach on other people’s domains in order to protect themselves.
Men who are obsessed with having all the power often are covering their own insecurities and weaknesses by exploiting others. Rather than using their good instinct to bring order to their lives and their communities, they instead work hard to prove their own competence in order to always stay ahead of the person who is perceived to be a threat.
Passive men are afraid of power, and will do anything to avoid having it. They would rather be ruled than rule. They fear failure, so they don’t try to succeed at all. They do not accept responsibility over their domains, and in consequence, their lives are often on the brink of disaster. Nothing ever seems to work out for them because they never work hard at anything, and sadly, they don’t really care.
Men who are afraid of having power are “Mama’s Boys,” always relying on another person, often a nurturer, to assume responsibility for them. They are not motivated, they have no convictions about important matters, and they retreat when a stronger personality is present, including dangerous people who provoke them physically, like bullies, thugs, intruders, etc.
Men’s Leadership Training is on Wednesday evenings from 5:00-8:00 at Molly Malone’s in Covington.